In Malaysia, premarital sex is still a big NO-NO in our culture for various reasons. Sex comes with responsibility. Thus it does not matter if it is premarital sex, extra-marital sex, marriage sex or even unconsented sex. If you engage in premarital sex, be prepared to take all consequences including dealing with your God, pregnancy, the potential gossips and condemnations from the world, etc. Sexuality is not an instrument of enjoying lustful pleasure for human beings, at least. In premarital sex, many a times, immature human beings explore the sexuality, jut out of curiosity, and might be are unaware of the consequences. Society has forbid premarital sex from the very outlook that adolescence is the time to form oneself as mature and responsible human being and not at all a time to procreate.
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We have to start saying ‘No!’ to premarital sex. We should keep in mind that engaging in premarital sex is not the best way to convey your love towards the one you loved. We should push the thought to the back of our minds and remember that we would definitely feel sorry later if we engaged in premarital sex.
One of the ways to prevent premarital sex is to start from education. Sex education should begin at home and as early as possible in a child’s life. The parents must have a close relationship with the child to make him feel comfortable to talk about his anxiety and concerns. From the healthy discussion between the parents and the child, the topic of premarital sex can be brought up easily. The parents may give the child piece of advice on dealing with the relationship between couples. Keep an open mind and be ready to answer any questions openly and honestly. Learning the truth about sex is much better then learning false info from peers.
The parents have to help their child when their child is in a relationship. The parents should not get panic and freak out when their child is in a relationship. They should help the child in avoiding temptation. For example, the child can go on supervised group dates and invite the partner over when an adult is home where premarital sex is less likely to happen. One-to-one time with the partner alone should be strongly discouraged as this may lead to unwanted accidents to happen. The child should be aware of the serious consequences of premarital sex such as unwanted pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases like AIDS. Currently, there is no known cure for AIDS. Though most parents may know this information, keep it in mind when discussing sexual behaviours with children. Educate your children with this information. It may mean life or death.
Luckily, parents are not the sole providers of sex education. Schools can lend a hand by helping parents teach children about sex. Both of them should work hand in hand in handling this problem. The children and teenagers should be taught to protect themselves from premarital sex. They must understand that nobody can force them to do anything that they feel not comfortable with. They must realise how important it is to respect themselves, not using their bodies to fulfil the sexual desires of their partner. The school and the parents should tell the children to say “No!” firmly. The teenagers must remember, “If you don’t walk away, you will be sorry”.
The teenagers should strictly refrain themselves from reading, listening or viewing to those unsavoury media culture such as pornography and movies with sexual scene. Instead, they should choose something which is pure and healthy. For instance, they can involve in various healthy activities and sports which can build up their self-esteem.
They should draw a line wisely to set limit on the expressions of affections. The girls should never give out false signals by wearing tight and revealing clothes which may cause them to fall into sexual immorality. The boys should always refrain themselves from making any rash decisions and they should always think of the consequences they may face after involving in sexual immorality. You must lead your heart rather than letting it to lead you. The teenagers should always be careful about the uses of alcoholic beverages. They may lose their inhabitations under the influence of the alcohols. If the couples find themselves uncomfortable with the intimate situation, they must do something that breaks the mood. It is difficult to avoid premarital sex from happening, but with a bit more effort it will become easier. Never compromise to your principles and say “No!” firmly to premarital sex.
Is premarital sex good or bad? Well actually, that depends on us to decide it.
We can tell that premarital sex is against God, and it is unsafe physically and emotionally. Although sex is pleasurable, it is designed by God to be enjoyed by two married people. Sex is a holy gift from God wherein we celebrate it after marriage. A person should think long and hard before involving in premarital sex.
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Premarital sex seems to be a norm in nowadays. This should not be allowed among the teenagers. They should be aware of the bad sides of premarital sex. In a pleasure of a moment, they are being blinded by the sexual desire. In the moment of lust and passion, their future is destroyed. In the moment of foolishness and self-gratification, they will fall into the dark abyss. Sexual desire is like a fire and won’t stop until it burns itself.
Sex is for married couples and when done out of marriage it cause a lot of harm to the doers. The effects are not immediate but later in life they are devastating. The scars of premarital sex are painful and difficult to get rid of. They will leave an indelible mark in your life and it will always follow you even in your marriage. They will shame you, degrade you and interfere with your life. Imagine meeting your previous sex partners whilst with your husband and children. How would you feel? You will wish to hide but you’ll have no place to do so. So, think about it before it is too late.
Premarital sex should strictly be banned from teenagers’ life. Parents have great responsibilities in educating their children about the essence of marriage and proper sex education should be given to the children. Parents should make an endeavour in teaching their children about sex, letting them know that it can be pleasurable, but there are so many risks involved – sexually transmitted diseases, AIDS and HIV, and unwanted pregnancy – all which can be prevented. The teenagers will be in matured mind. As a result, the teenagers will know that marriage is not only about having sex, but having a harmonious family and a heavy responsibility as well.
Teenagers should always keep in mind that, if a boy or girl truly loves you, they will want the best for you. They will not want you to suffer fear of disease, unwanted pregnancy and the psychological difficulties of premarital sex. They will want to experience love with you only in the very best place of all – the love nest of marriage. So, say “No!” to premarital sex before it is too late.